Doesn't matter how smart or talented or attractive you are -- you can still stand out in all your interactions through a handful of key strategies. Universally, these attributes can make you the kind of person that other people want to know, work with and do business with. One such quality is your posture.
How you sit and stand conveys volumes about you. When you're standing, tall, symmetrical, expansive posture conveys more presence than slouched, leaning (on one leg), small posture. The key when standing is to be symmetrical. In other words, if you were to draw a line down the center of the body, it would be fairly even on both sides. Picture this asymmetrical posture: a man standing, leaning with his weight on his right leg, while his left foot is crossed in front of it. Picture his left arm hanging at his side while his right hand reaches across his body and clutches the elbow of his left arm. This asymmetrical stance doesn't conjure up a vision of power and confidence, does it?
Speaker Floor Stand
On the other hand, if his posture is symmetrical, his weight would be evenly distributed on both feet. His arms would be in a relaxed and open position, such as bent at a right angle with his hands loosely clasped in front of him. Can you see how this symmetry is more poised?
But when you're seated, it's a different story. Try to picture a woman sitting in a perfectly symmetrical posture: both feet on the floor, legs together; her hands clasped in her lap, or even with each one resting on the arm of her chair. Does that symmetrical position look comfortable and powerful? Picture instead the person sitting with her legs crossed, with say, her left arm resting on the arm of the chair, and her right elbow propped on the other arm of the chair and her hand held up to her chin. Can you see how that conveys more comfort and ease? Even when you're seated at a table where people can't see your legs, this still applies to your arms. If both your hands are in your lap, or if they're folded together on the table, can you see how the first one looks meek and the second one looks a little formal and perhaps rigid? But picture one forearm down on the table in front of you, and the other hand holding a pen. Or one hand propped under your chin and the other cupping your elbow. Can you see how that looks more comfortable and confident?
One other comment on asymmetrical posture. Keep in mind that the more asymmetrical you are, the more casual you appear. Picture a guy sitting with his ankle propped up on his knee (which is more asymmetrical than just crossed legs) and with one arm stretched out across the back of a chair beside him. Can you see how this posture -- which body language experts would call territorial -- has a very informal presence about it? It might be perfectly appropriate for the man to sit like this in his own office, but can you see how it would be inappropriate if he were on someone else's turf? He would be taking up space and assuming a casualness that would be inappropriate because it's not his space to claim.
So here's the irony. When you're standing, use symmetrical posture to have more power. But when you're seated, recognize that asymmetrical posture, such as with legs crossed or hands somewhat off-balance, has more confidence. Those guidelines will give you "stand out" posture.